Normals and Avoidant Personalities - Ask and lets find out what the other is thinking.

I have Avoidant Personality (Avpd). That makes it a bit difficult to put myself in the shoes of someone that does not have this. Its the old story of walking a mile in another persons shoes. Often, we cant really understand what another person is going through until we have had the same problem.

Its the same with Avoidant Personality. I find it very hard to be able to figure out how "Normals" think, what they go through and what they have to put up with. Of course, we can turn that around on them and say the exact same thing. Few Normals can put themselves in the shoes of one that suffers from Avoidant Personality and be able to think like them, and empathize with them.

My wife is the exception to this. Well, at least to a point. I dont think its possible to completely get what its like living with Avoidant Personality. But, she is tries as best she can and I think she has picked up on a lot. Most of that insight came to her in the form of communication from God.

I am not sure its really possible to get this in any other way. Oh sure, one can learn what its like from books, from professionals and even in schools. But until you have had Avpd, its hard, if not impossible to really get it. The best way that a Normal can figure out what life is life to a Avpd is to learn it from God.

God can put it in your heart. God can give Normals the understanding and the empathy for Avoidants. Head knowledge is like the belt they wear in Martial Arts. The only thing a belt is good for is to hold up your pants. The only thing that Head Knowledge is good for is getting you a good paying job and maybe impressing people at parties.

All this to say that I want to understand Normals. No, thats not a trick question. I want to know what its like for a Normal that is trying to live with someone that has Avpd. What sort of questions would you ask a Normal that is trying as hard as they can, and either finding it very hard or right out failing, to be in a relationship with someone that has AvpD?

If we ask each other some honest questions, I think we can learn to understand each other. If we learn to understand each other, thats a good start toward being able to not only tolerate each other, but even having a successful relationship.

I have 3 things for you today.

#1 I set up a Facebook group for Avoidants and those that want to learn to live with someone that has this.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/AvoidantPersonality

#2 I have a web site, that is still being worked on. Eventually, I want to get all the info I can find on Avoidants, possible help for Avoidants, and help for those that are trying to be in a relationship with one.
http://avoidants.org

#3 Normals - If you have questions that you would like to ask someone that has Avpd, please send them to me, I will get them answered. Please let me know when you email if you do, or do not, wish me to use your question to help others. I respect your privacy and will never use your real name or contact info.

Avoidants - If you have questions that you would like to ask a normal, please send them to me and I will get them answered. Please let me know when you email if you do, or do not, wish me to use your question to help others. I respect your privacy and will never use your real name or contact info.

If we learn how the other ticks, we will making the 1st step toward understanding each other!









This is my log of my issues with living to Avoidant Personality Disorder. My hope is that in writing this, it will help myself and perhaps others that are also struggling with this disorder and others like it. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1tyKSgW-IeaK851gvIjjthije0kOwg3tZxVqKXSC1xXg/viewform I am trying to get more information on this disorder so that we can find commonalities. Perhaps if we can learn more about this, we can figure out how to combat it and get better lives for us all.