Coming out of the closet??

I bet that got your attention!

I wil be 51 years old this year. I am an Avoidant Personality. I am told that it was likely genetic, which means that I was probably born with it. There are things that happened in my life that made it worse. But I won't go into those things here.

I have always hidden my problem. I have feared to make it known to anyone other than my wife. I have feared that if people that knew me knew about this, I would be shunned, ostricized and judged.

To make these even worse, I am a Christian Pastor. How can I possibly be infected with a mental disorder? Luckily, I don't pastor anywhere right now. I just attend Church.

What if my friends knew?
What if my family knew?
What about the Church members?
What about people that I work with?
Would they look at me differently, or at all?
Would I ever be called on to Pastor anywhere again?

Well, these are questions that I have had no answer for all these years. I still don't know how people will react. I have lived in fear of this al my life. Well, I finally decided to come out of the closet. I will put this out there for anyone and everyone to know. Im not going to advertise it, but neither will I hide it anymore.

Paul had some sort of issue that God refused to remove from his body. We don't really know what it was. Most people think that it was a physical deformity of some sort. But what if he was an Avoidant or he had some other sort of mental issue?

Throughout the Bible, God didn't have any desire to use folks that had it all together. He never looked to use those that were perfect, had perfect diction, a perfect body, or even had anything at all going for them.

God used those that were, in the worlds eyes, defective. I think he did that on purpose.

So maybe there is hope for me. Maybe shedding light on my being an Avoidant is a good thing. I hope so.

So for better or worse, here i come!!!






This is my log of my day to day issues with living to Avoidant Personality Disorder. My hope is that in writing this, it will help myself and perhaps others that are also srtuggling with this disorder or another like it.http://www.AvoidantPersonality.com